[Fantasy Baseball] Star City Showdown
Ford Fricks Asterisk : April 9, 2008 03:43 PM

After a painstakingly long selection process, Star City, West Virginia was chosen from the dozens of applicants for the site of the latest Barnstorming tournament. The selection committee was overwhelmed that Star City has all the amenities of any respectable midwestern town -- interstate access, a Best Western, and a Texas Longhorn Steakhouse.

Round #1 of the tournament opened with Happy Jack Stivetts and the Goodyear Heights Dirigibles attempting to rise above the favored Minneapolis Thunder Bitches. However, after their young Olympic shorstop Cory Snyder gave them the early lead with a 3-run homer, the Dirigibles crashed and burned. Mythical hero Mickey Klutts tied the game with a 2-run bomb in the 3rd, and Ed "Loose" Karger settled in to blank the Dirigibles the rest of the way. Otix Nixon singled in what would prove to be the game winning run in the 4th, as the Bitches prevailed 5-3.

Next up the Morris Townies made their tournament debut against the grizzled veterans of San Jose. Aside from a Nate Colbert home run, the Townies hit a wall against Lenny Barker and Sonic Reducers. Randy Jones kept Morris close by distracting San Jose with his white man's 'fro, but the Reducers prevailed 4-2, thanks to solo shots from Bernard Gilkey and Dale Murphy.

Jack Harshman and Tommy John hooked up in the day's top pitchers duel, as the Mighty Minnows sank the Kennard Killers tournament hopes, 2-1. All three runs scored on solo home runs, with Bill Buckner saving the theatrics for a last at-bat 2-out dinger in the bottom of the 8th. John struck out 8 on his way to victory.

Whiskeytown trashed the Tree Huggers, putting together five multi-run innings in a 12-1 victory over Ann Arbor. Tree Huggers leadoff man Ed Kirkpatrick set a tournament record by homering in the team's first at-bat of the game, but Black Jack McDowell allowed just three singles and a walk the rest of the way, as the Loserings attempt to translate the league's best record into their first tournament championship. Billy Werber's 3 runs and 4 hits led an offense that collected a total of 14 hits and 9 walks.

The Killer Rabbits quest for the holy grail ended in the first inning when Pennsauken Pill Poppers got back-to-back rbi doubles from Greg Goosen and Danny Taylor. Jason Giambi added a 3-run homer in the 4th, but it was unnecessary, as Bill Hoffer limited the Rabbits to a run on four hits.

Next, the dbacks assured that all the Killers would be killed in round one, as they knocked off the Streets of McLean BambiKiller Killers, 11-7. The dbacks put a 7 spot on the board in the 3rd inning against McLean starter Blue Moon Odom. Carlos Delgado and "The Hit Man" Mike Easler lead the dbacks offense, both going 3-for-4 on the day... Delgado with a home run, 4 runs and 3 rbi, and Easler with 2 doubles and 4 rbi. Jim Rice provided the only highlight of the day for the Killers with a bases-clearing double in the 6th.

Denny McLain provided the stat of the day for the Columbus Rippers. He allowed 4 hits in 4 at-bats to Durham Bulldogs DH Rance Mulliniks, and held the rest of the Durham lineup to an 0-fer-27 day. The Rippers shutout the Bulldogs, 4-0, but Roy Foster's 2-run homer in the 5th was the only offense McLain needed.

Day #1 ended with the Yoknapatawpha Yellow Hammers keeping their perfect tournament streak intact, losing in the first round yet again. They didn't make it easy on the Grunge Rockers, though, as day's longest game went 11 innings before Brian Giles hit a walk-off double against Carl Hubbell. Honus Wagner had 4 hits and Frank had 3, including the game's only home run. Craig Wilson doubled and tripled to drive home four of the Y-Hammers six runs.

We're going to forego the Round 2 matchups & probable starters, as the games have just been played anyway. Round 2 coverage will hopefully be posted tomorrow.

- Ovaltine Jenkins

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